Request and Reply Protocols

I would ask that we adopt a protocol for making purchase requests and replying to them. Nothing is more annoying than "I need this." (which I also do in a frenzy) and getting back "I have that."

What I should ask is more like: I need x-item in QA-y or better. I need about z-quantity of them in town-a. Now you know exactly what I am looking for.(Feel free to insert your own variables to taste)

Which should prompt you to respond with: I have those in QA-y. I have them in town-A, so you would have to pick up shipping. I will charge you price-p/unit. Deal?

That makes more sense to me than using several mails and hours, if not days, to close a simple deal. I could have half my Enterprise down for lack of a resource. (I do have half my Enterprise down for lack of a resource, actually. It is a Grim thing, indeed.) That doesn't help me or the TG. If I have other team mates waiting on goods from me, it causes a cascade of unhappy grimness that can only spread like a grim pestilence across the land, causing fear and trembling and sickness unto grim death.
OK, maybe not trembling.
So I grimly make this humble request that we communicate fully and in a way that expedites the deal. This game is, after all, about the grim art of the deal.

Is the red over the top? The red might be over the top. I can't resist color on a black background.